The closest she is ever going to get
by Mirumo
Summary: "The bastard doesn't notice a thing, of course. Oblivious to what he does to her. "  Angsty not so romantic one-way romance. Sex implied.


**Author : **Mirumo

**Title : **The closest she is ever going to get

**Rating : **T for language and insinuations.

**Genre : **Angst & Romance

**Length : **750

**Disclaimer : **Doesn't belong to me, guys.

**Notes : **I'm intending this one to be way different from what I already wrote about Sheldon and Penny. Quite angsty, sex intended, and not funny. Not even romantic, as it happens. Extremely OOC, too.

Penny doesn't know how it happened.

What is even slightly appealing in DC Comics T-shirts, plaid trousers and long-sleeved shirts in atrocious colours, anyway? In hair cut too short, in a skin which is way too pale, and a lack of muscles?

She sees those goddamn awful clothes and just wants to rip them off his thin lanky body.

She studies his condescending blue eyes and imagines them looking down at her intently, his body lying on hers.

She overhears him scowling Leonard for disturbing his things, tone dropping low, and wishes this voice would order her to get on her knees.

The bastard doesn't notice a thing, of course. Oblivious to what he does to her. He can mess with her underwear, grab her breast, take a good look at her ass, but won't act any differently the day after. At one point, she even started welcoming him in her apartment wearing very few clothes on ; he didn't even pay attention to it, anyway, only making the remark that she was taking the risk of catching a severe cold if she didn't wear anything beside that towel. Not to mention her damp hair.

What does it matter, really? He is a Vulcan. He doesn't have a deal. Whether she is just coming out of her bath or wearing après-skis, it will never be worthy of interest for this beautiful frigging mind of his. Even her gay friends would have a stronger reaction if she appeared in her underwear at her door, for Christ's sake!

It has been a while since she had sex. But this is not the cause of her not so recent anymore obsession ; this is the direct consequence. Last time she came home slightly drunk after a failed audition and headed towards Leonard's room to have some comforting shag, she realised that, while her ex-boyfriend was having trouble with her bra, she was listening, wondering if the crazy roommate could hear them. Kinda hoping he could. A few weeks after this disturbing experience, she had called an old fuck buddy of hers, and ended up, without a doubt, picturing how _he _would be in bed.

She didn't try having sex, neither only going out and innocently flirting, since then. She doesn't even masturbate. Last time it happened, a couple of weeks ago, it felt wrong. The hands sliding up her thighs were too small, not clean enough, they didn't smell of soap and board markers.

So, she stays home every night when she doesn't have to work, now, and she goes playing in 4A, at every video games that they are playing. Whether she is playing against or with him, it doesn't matter. Whether he loses or wins, it doesn't matter either.

She watches his passionate eyes narrow. Listens to his low groans or his high-pitched whimpers. Sees his knuckles getting white. Stares at him as he gets all alpha-male with her or the guy, shouting rude orders. Studies his face when he turns towards her and casts an arrogant look. Can't help examining his tensed forearms, his long fingers quickly soothing the game controller.

When he's satisfied with her, the corner of his mouth raises just a little, and he nods quietly, staring deep into her eyes for a second, before gloating. If he won against her, his full-of-himself gaze runs all over her with an insufferable contentment. He sometimes insult her at the top of his voice, when she beat him or just made their team lose.

She wants to smash his beautiful obnoxious face as much as she wants to crush her mouth on it.

At the beginning, she had just wondered how he would react if she threw herself at him and went all cow-girl on his ass, just to loosen him up a little and see if he _really _was all Vulcan.

Now, she wakes up three or four nights a week, forehead damp and inner thighs moist, the oh so visual image of him ripping off her shorts, taking her against the wall, biting her neck ... running in her mind all day long.

Would she be in "Pride & Prejudice", she would know that, eventually, the hateful jerk would do something super romantic and reveal himself as a sex beast. But she is in no sort of rom-com or sitcom, and she knows that he will never change.

Playing Halo with him is the closest to being fucked by Sheldon that she is ever going to get.

**A/N : Surely the angstiest, weirdest, most sexed up and most OOC thing that I ever wrote, but I'm pretty happy with it.**


End file.
